I just want answers to why i feel the way i do all the time. Why cant i just be healthy and do the normal everyday things I used. Instead I battle daily pain and headaches, dry eyes and sinus's, dry throat and cough, hormone issues, vision and taste changes, brain fog, irritability and shortness, heart feels like its beating so hard its gonna come right out of my chest, sores in my mouth often times, stomach issues, digestion stuff, and the list goes on. Meanwhile I do my best to put on a brave face, not complain and just do anything I can to get through my day. Things seem to be getting harder and harder for me everyday. I haven't seen a doc other than my naturopathic doc since last year and I'm really not looking forward to starting over with a new primary who will probably start the whole pass the buck off to a dozen different specialists only to be sent to psych because they think i have a personality disorder or better yet just tell me I'm a hypochondriac.
I have suffered for a very long time its just been the last 2 years things have been slowly getting unbearable. I know in my own self that something isn't right but its getting others to help and see it to that are proving to be impossible. I hate being told "just don't think about it" , " stay positive", " just get over it" " there are people so much worse off than you so you should be happy" " you just need to take this stuff n you'd be fine". I have heard them all and I'm tired of it. I put on my brave face and I suck it up and push through it. I do get to the point where I'm gonna snap and need to just let it out. I'm sorry to all my friends that have had the joy of being on the receiving end of my vents. I don't want pity its just nice to have an ear to get it all out with. I don't know how much longer I can take this i feel like any day I'm gonna crack and lose it. I fight every day for my kids. They need there mommy but truly how good am i to them like this.
There has to be someone out there that will fight for me. Help me get the answers to why and what.
last week and this week have been particularly bad. Whatever it is in me that lays dormant has decided to rear its ugly head FULL FORCE.
very dry eyes, nose and throat, cough heart pounding.
Very very bad headache so bad that i cant see my ears are ringing and the room is spinning.
My legs have been weak and its been a struggle just to walk around the house.
I have thought about doing a separate blog to catalog my days but honestly it would be boring and redundant.
I don't go to E.R. bcuz that is just a waste of $150 plus 20% to be told there is nothing we can do go home.
Trust me I have tried everything anyone has suggested and nothing is working. Its just gotta run its course (God only knows how long it will last)
I have lost weight, gotten off ALL prescription meds, changed diet and environment, gotten glasses, done physical therapy, pain management, had heart tests, blood tests, seen rhuematologist, endocrinologist, cardiologist, My old primary started to hit on things n then we moved.
Please God let there be a doc here that is willing to be aggressive and persistent. I think i have suffered long enough to deserve answers.
Thanks all for reading sorry to bore you. I know y'all have heard it alot so thank you for enduring once again.
